barely had a single good night sleep since last week. whenever i find a time to take a nap, it would usually take half an hour to get me drifted off... and half an hour is precious and a luxury.
still procrastinating at the 11th hour... and the result of the presentation was not as i suspected. i suspected a failing grade actually given the bad critic i received throughout the whole 30mins of presentation. the only good critic i got was good verbal presentation... others? zilch... the critics say i lack passion and joy in doing my work. not to say i was deeply hurt. they barely know me... how i work... in what way i show or express my passion and joy... and also at what scale is my passion and joy... perhaps my maximum level of passion and joy in work is others' at minimum. and comparing is another aspect since i may be not as smart as the next guy and perhaps i take a little more time synthesizing and analyzing my research. there was no use in telling them as defense because they were pretty judgmental on it. and i have high respects for the elders. however, their comments really do motivate me.
on the eve of the post-presentation day, i should be able to sleep better now. but i'm wide awake. i just came back from watching a theater performance and a late night dinner with friends. we were all saying how tired we are... how we're going to be sleeping and missing prayers... but yet, when i arrive, i can't seem to fall asleep.
have i turned insomniac???
